What comes first? Being loved or loving oneself?

Tonight, in Dallas, TX I met a cute-ass latino boy. He was 26, I was 29. We both weren't single. He was new to Dallas (4 months only) and I was too (1 day, visiting for work.) Hector's friend treated him like shit. Made fun of him and humilitated him in front of me. Apparently there was competition to get in my pants. But i was drawn to Hector right in the beginning. He was cute, out going, sincere, and had really tried to convince himself that he was able to pull himself up by his bootstraps. He emigrated from El Paso with 50 bucks, at 26, 120lbs, gay and latino in Bush country. Besides his friend who called him "ghetto," Hector was all along in the lone star. After his friend ditched him because he was jealous that Hector was going to laid (who was in love with who?) Hector rejected his proposed lay and came to me upset that his friend ditched him. I was amazed that Hector believed that he was actually "ghetto," "not lovable," and eventually told me that he haden't met anyone like me that was so nice to him. Either he hadn't and he would or it was is manipulation to get me into bed to feel sorry for him. More reason NOT to sleep with him right?? I felt really sorry for him over the pizza I bought for both of us that he was alone, in a big big world with no support. On top of that he didn't want anyone cuz he wanted to prove to himself (and me I think) that he could do it ALL alone. I told him never are we alone. He wouldn't have it as he cried on my shoulder and then begging for me to come home with him. There is no way that someone could love him if he truely didn't love himself. Was he so needing affirmation that is lovable that he needed me to do the loving for him, the love that he needed to do for himself? Or did he just need that nice loving guy to encourage him and support him like I was tonight? Would that be enough to spark the motivation and self-love that he so needed? I told him I couldn't go home with him, even though I really wanted to get my groove on. It just wasn't right for him nor for me. Especially for my partner! Giving love isn't the same as loving. And sometime love is not loving. But where does the spark of love begin, with yourself or with others? Can love exist without an object...me nor you? Or it cannot exist without you nor me? For Hector's sake, I hope it finds him before he or anyone else finds it.